H

eather Anne Halpert
Some Books I Haven’t Written:

+ more by Heather Anne’s in our print issue. Drag selection over text to by-pass graphics.

  1. Some Categories of Unpaid Work, Reading, and Wearing Pants like a Flaneur
  2. Some Memory Palaces I Used To Know
  3. World Domination Through Mapping, Artificial Memory, and Panoptical Vision
  4. Junk Drawer Caches of the Unclassifiable
  5. Collections, Taxonomies, Fantasies of Power Through Knowledge, the Database, and the Still Life
  6. The Database Form, Reading Like Looking, the Human Computer Interface and Haptic Vision
  7. Byte Strings, Base eight, and the Webbed Spaces Between My Fingers
  8. Technology or Idolatry, Or: Why Pee In a Pot?
  9. The Revolt of the Objects, the Sorcerer’s Apprentice, and Humanity Pulverized By Smart Metates and Bulletproof Vests
  10. A Lordly Dish of Butter, Again
  11. Posing a Problem: The Disordered Still Life, the Hostile User Interface, and Other Species of Eternal Life
  12. Against (and for) the Wunderkammer, Translation, Transition, Transi Tombs, and Sea Changes
  13. Translation, Transcription, Quotation, and Transubstantiation
  14. Translation, Quotation, and Emotion: Telling a True Story With Someone Else’s Words
  15. Compost, Verdures, Local Bestiaries, and the Posthumous City of Judgmental Guinea Pigs
  16. Unearned Confidence, Mortality and Monumentality, Good Taste, and Polonius’s Supper in the Simultaneous Present
  17. Avoiding Solipsism From the Center of the Universe
  18. My Resting Heart Rate Over Three Years
  19. Quantum Entanglement, the Asymmetrically Winged Chariot, and the Growth Difference between Vaster, Medium Big, and Very Small Vegetable Loves
  20. Witnesses and Spectators
  21. The Sun As Witness and A Stop Frame Animation of Time
  22. Robert Smithson, Voracious Feminine Lust, Tupac, Betty Boop, and the Heart as Big as a Whale
  23. Bonobo Porn, Birthday Cake, Enthusiasm, and Excusable Pica
  24. Slapstick Minimalism, Mirrors, Farce, Friction, and the Moral Ideal
  25. Gravity and Time’s Arrow, Or: The Exploding Blunderbuss and the Windowsill Where Pies Cool and Pots Fall
  26. Springs, Petards, Boomerangs, and the Virtue in Never Being Wrong
  27. Nested Photographs of Things
  28. Panofsky, Early Modern Visual Culture, Allegories, Categories, and Allergies
  29. Ink
  30. Some Multiple Choice Questions About Art for Which I have Answers Prepared in Advance